Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
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It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
sex in a hospital.. check
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He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize