happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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