I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs