Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
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