I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
