I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
