this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
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