Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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