So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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