They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
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i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
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Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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