she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
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