my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
