this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
