problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
