why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
