Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
