that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Randomize
