Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
