Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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