Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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