I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize