you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
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