And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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