So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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