those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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