If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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