Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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