They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
