I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I don't think brook has ever known best
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Randomize
