I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
