Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
You work out of a Hotel?
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i came on her dog
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
