I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
