another moral hangover. fuck.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
