i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I just found puke in my bra..
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
