There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
