I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.