haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
