just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize