Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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