i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
