Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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