just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
