Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(678): View more from Georgia

Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.

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(678): Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry. http://tfl.nu/8kmb

Replies (3) Good night (600) Bad night (1297)
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(251): View more from Alabama

How was last night?

(334): View more from Alabama

She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.

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(251): How was last night? (334): She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast. http://tfl.nu/qxti

Replies (2) Good night (619) Bad night (2248)
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(240): View more from Maryland

And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.

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(240): And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender. http://tfl.nu/1lfm

Replies (8) Good night (6359) Bad night (651)
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(410): View more from Maryland

when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink

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(410): when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink http://tfl.nu/mfes

Replies (14) Good night (1258) Bad night (4114)
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(616): View more from Michigan

I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.

(616): View more from Michigan

The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...

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(616): I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself. (616): The wine tasting is just for charity anyways... http://tfl.nu/d1ju

Replies (3) Good night (2897) Bad night (841)
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(770): View more from Georgia

The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.

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(770): The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten. http://tfl.nu/cbpd

Replies (2) Good night (1170) Bad night (515)
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(706): View more from Georgia

It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.

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(706): It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later. http://tfl.nu/oph9

Replies (0) Good night (824) Bad night (918)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...

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(412): Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation... http://tfl.nu/ehdf

Replies (4) Good night (1437) Bad night (560)
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(207): View more from Maine

HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.

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(207): HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health. http://tfl.nu/zxtp

Replies (9) Good night (1175) Bad night (433)
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(616): View more from Michigan

my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!

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(616): my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES! http://tfl.nu/l6hp

Replies (5) Good night (588) Bad night (737)
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(815): View more from Illinois

is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?

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(815): is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal? http://tfl.nu/lpf5

Replies (14) Good night (749) Bad night (493)
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(650): View more from California

Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.

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(650): Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels. http://tfl.nu/tpw7

Replies (1) Good night (829) Bad night (293)
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(513): View more from Ohio

You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!

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(513): You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up! http://tfl.nu/45jw

Replies (3) Good night (681) Bad night (439)
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(907): View more from Alaska

As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.

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(907): As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan. http://tfl.nu/b2sh

Replies (2) Good night (528) Bad night (271)
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(602): View more from Arizona

He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.

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(602): He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper. http://tfl.nu/wbxd

Replies (4) Good night (489) Bad night (240)

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