you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
