My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
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Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
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You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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