Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Randomize
