Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
ugly people sure do ruin things
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
