Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
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I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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