He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
