I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
