youre lurking in front of me
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I just got carded by a ten year old.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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