just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
